One Night In Bangkok
by Lady Firemyst
Summary: A songfic I wrote during midterm exams under the influence of Dr Pepper. It's a pwp that parodys the song


****

ONE NIGHT IN BANGKOK

by Lady Firemyst a.k.a. the holy psychic invincable sword goddess ^_^

Author: Hiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeee minna-chan! I'm back and scaryer than ever! The Dr. Pepper is kicking in! Caffene, a good thing!

****

Heero: No, it makes you hyper. 

****

Author: SO!

****

Duo: When you're hyper you do weird things to us!

****

Heero: *raises an eyebrow*

****

Author: No, Heero! Get your mind out of the gutter! ANYWAY!...Disclamer. I don't own the G-Wing characters...

****

Duo: Thank God. 

****

Author: You be quiet! HOWEVER!...I'm going to borrow them and have complete control over them for the duration of this fic. 

****

Duo: *gulps*

****

Heero: *pales* 

****

Author: *smirks* To continue, I also don't own the song "One Night in Bangkok." I don't remember who it's by, but it ain't mine. 

NOW...let the fic begin!

****

Song lyrics **look like this**

*My commentary looks like this.* 

****

Bangkok! Orientle setting

*Heero walks out of an airport with a BIG sign on it that says "Bangkok." He's dressed like a chess geek in plaid pants, a white shirt, and wearing coke-bottle glasses. He is carrying a suitcase. *

****

And the city don't know what the city is getting

*He pulls out a gun and scares passers by*

****

The creme de la creme of the chess world in a 

Show with everything but Yule Brenner

*The king of Siam himself walks by Heero*

****

Time flies! Dosen't seem a minute

*Heero looks at his watch, a gear pops out, signaling that it is broken*

****

Since the Tirolen Spa had the chess boys in it

*Our hero walks by a building with a BIG sign saying "Tirolean Spa." Trowa, Quatre, and Wufei walk out also dressed like chess geeks.*

****

All change! Don't you know that when you

*Heero glares at the author, she takes out her katana, he goes back to the fic.*

****

Play at his level there's no ordinary venue

It's Iceland-or the Philippines-or Hastings-or-or this place

*Heero is transported to Iceland, then the Philippines, then Hastings, then back. He glares at the author again, then backs away from the wrath of her katana*

****

One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster

*Heero chokes as the author makes him eat an oyster*

****

The Bars are temples but the pearls ain't free

*He starts caughing and spit's out a pearl*

****

You'll find a God in every golden cloister

*Heero walks into a golden temple*

****

And if your lucky then the God's a she

*Duo appears with flowers in his braid and wearing a long, pink dress (author snickers)*

****

I feel an angel sliding up to me

*Duo walks up to heero. Heero sweatdropps.* *Blackout*

****

One town's very like another

When your head's down over your pieces brother

*Heero appears, stareing intently at some chess pieces shaped like the Gundums*

****

It's a drag, it's a bore, it's really such a pity

To be looking at the board, not looking at the city

*Heero has a chess board held up to his face like a book.*

****

Waddya mean? You've seen one crowded, polluted, stinking town you've-

*Heero once again trys to give the author his patanted death glare, and once again shrinks away from her katana*

****

Tea, girls, warm, sweet

*Relena comes in and glomps Heero*

****

Some are set up in the Somerset Mangham Suite

*Heero breaks free and runs into a building with a BIG sign that says "Sommerset Mangham"*

****

Get Thai'd! You're talking to a tourist

*He sneaks out the back door and runs from Relena the stalker*

****

Whose every move is among the purest

*Heero calms down once safely away from Relena. He curses at the author, but she cuts a nearby fruitstand in half with her katana and he shuts up.*

****

I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine

*The author sidekicks Heero in the chest, he falls backwards. He gets up and she highkicks him in the same place (above his waist) back to the ground*

****

One night in Bangkok makes the hard man humble

*Heero brushes the dust off himself and stands up*

****

Not much between dispair and ecasty

*Heero spots Relena again and runs into an alley*

****

One night in Bangkok and the tough guys tumble

*He trips and falls into the dust again*

****

Can't be to careful with your company

*He leavs the alley and heads back out into the street*

****

I can feel the devil walking next to me

*Unknowingly, Heero walks by the author, who is sharpening her katana* *Blackout*

****

Siam's gonna be the witness

*Wing Zero appears*

****

To the ultimat test of ceribral fitness

*Heero starts mumbling that he's the only one mentaly strong enough forr the zero system. HEERO ON ZERO, BABY!*

****

This grips me more than would a

Muddy old river or a reclining Buddha

*Heero in Wing Zero narrowly misses crishing a statue of Buddha*

****

But thank god I'm only watching the game

*Author smirks "Enough of that"*

****

Controling it

*Author sharpens katana* *Blackout*

****

I don't see you guys rating

*Heero appears in the street*

****

The kind of mate I'm contemplating

*Duo appears, still in the dress*

****

I'de let you watch, I would Invite you

But the queens we use would not excite you

*A delicate tiara materializes on Duo's head*

****

So you'de better go back to your bars, your temples, your massage parlors

*Heero appears in a bar, Duo in a temple, and the other three G-boys in front of a massage parlor (conviently where some otakus were hanging out. Firestar, Shadow, Fishy, Dancy, they're all yours...FOR NOW!)*

****

One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster

*Author makes Heero eat another oyster*

****

The bars are temples but the pears ain't free

*He starts choking and hacks up another pearl*

****

You'll find a God in every golden cloister

*Heero walks into another golden temple*

****

A little flesh, a little history

*Yep, you guessed it! Duo, still in the pink dress.*

****

I can feel an angel sliding up to me

*Duo coyly walks twords Heero*

****

One night in Bangkok makes a hard man humble

*Heero trips over the author's foot*

****

Not much between dispare and extacy

*Heero's vision is fuzzy, and he mistakes Duo for Relina*

****

One night in Bangkok and the tough guys tumble

*Heero stands up, only to fall again*

****

Can't be to careful with your company

I can feel the devil walking next to me

*Author sits quietly watching the amusing scene, sharpening her katana again*

****

Author: It's DONE! YAY!

****

Duo: Yay! I don't have to wear a dress anymore!

****

Heero: Don't you _ever_ do that to us again!

****

Author: Shut up you! *points her oh-so-sharp-by-now-katana at the boys* I just might be forced to write a sequel! Ya know, maybe I should save the others from those otakus.....nah!


End file.
